Those Who Love Us
by justwanttologin
Summary: Bella's parents die when she is very young leaving her in the care of a woman who really only cares about getting what she wants.
1. Chapter 1

_A/N I am reposting this as I have it betaed. I might rewrite parts of it but I'm not sure yet. _

Renee's POV

I never liked Charlie being a cop. Sure I knew when I started dating him that's what he wanted to be and when I married him I knew he was starting his new job right after we got back from our weekend away. But I never liked it and I tried talking him out of it all the time but it was useless. His dad was a cop and he was going to be a cop. His dad was killed on duty and I guess Charlie wanted to be just like him.

Now I have an 11 month old daughter and the love of my life is dead. I can't handle this. I never even wanted kids. I love hern but I know I can't raise her alone and I don't have any family.

So I drop her off with my best friend Alison. Alison is a natural mother and when her little boy's dad ran out on them she started an in home daycare and she makes good money. She keeps Bella for me when I feel like I am about to go crazy. Alison and I grew up together along with Tina, who also has a little boy. While Tina and I are friends we've never been super close like me and Alison. Tina is more standoffish until she wants something. And then she'll stop at nothing to get whatever it is she wants.

Her little boy's father is the reason my Charlie is dead, but I don't blame her. She had no idea he was running around doing drugs and robbing gas stations. It's actually made us closer because we both lost our husbands.

After I drop her off with Alison I go back home and then I call Alison and tell her I can't take this anymore and I'm going to shoot myself, please take care of my Bella. I do love her; it's just not enough.

Alison of course begs and pleads for me to not do this. Bella needs me.

But she really doesn't. She needed Charlie. She doesn't need me.

I hang up and shoot myself before I can hesitate, before Alison can show up to stop me.

I love you Bella, it just wasn't enough.


	2. Chapter 2

_A/N Thank you to Babs81410 for being my awesome new beta! For this and my other new story Complicated. _

Alison's POV

Renee drops little Bella off, asking me to keep her for a couple of hours, and I tell her of course. Charlie has been gone a couple of months now and Renee doesn't seem to be showing any signs of improvement. I can't even imagine how she must be feeling so I do what I can, and that is usually keeping Bella when Renee just can't handle being a mother.

I always thought mothering was a natural instinct. Even Tina is a decent mother, she's just selfish. She knows when to feed Paul and when he cries she holds him. She loves him, but too many nights she decides she'd rather go out and party than be with him. Renee on the other hand loves being with Bella, she just doesn't really know what to do with her. So many times I've suggested she feed her when she's with me or to be the one to pick her up and hold her when she's upset about something. Charlie was a good dad so when he was around he helped Renee be a good mom. He encouraged her and made her feel like she could do it. Without Charlie, at least for the moment, she's a lost cause. So I do what I can.

About 30 minutes after she drops Bella off she calls me, telling me she's about to shoot herself and to please take care of Bella. I try to tell her to wait, I'm on my way, but she hangs up and I know I'll never make it. I call Tina and ask her to head to Renee's house while I run next door to get my neighbor to keep all the kids for a while.

When I get there Tina is sitting next to her in shock. I call the cops and then hold Tina as we cry. The cops tell us we have to go and they ask about Bella. I assure them she is taken care of right now and I will make sure she is always taken care of. Even if I won't be the one to take care of her. I will take care of her until I can't, but what Renee didn't know, what no one knows, is that I'm dying. I have a rare blood disease that is slowly killing me and there is nothing the doctors can do. I don't even know what I am going to do about Sam but hopefully whoever takes in Sam will want Bella too. I want Bella, I love her.

"Are you OK Alison?" Tina asks me. She knows how close I was to Renee.

"No, I'm not. I don't know how she could do this to Bella." I cannot even imagine leaving Sam.

"She knew you would take care of her, and probably better than she could have. You know Charlie was the one who knew what he was doing. Renee never felt comfortable with Bella. She probably couldn't stand the thought of being a single mom," Tina tells me and I know she's right except for the part about me taking care of Bella.

"I'm dying Tina. I don't even know who's going to take care of Sam," I tell her quietly. She looks at me in shock and I feel bad for telling her this right after what just happened.

"Oh goodness Alison. I mean how, when? I really don't understand."

So I tell her everything and then we just sit there together, both in our own little worlds.

"What about Josh?" she asks and I look at her like she's lost her mind.

"Josh left us."

"Well yes, but maybe if he knew Sam really needed him he would come back. I mean I know he sends money so he can't not care completely. But if you want, I will take him and I will take Bella no matter what."

I think about it and she might be right about Josh. He does send money and calls occasionally. Maybe he does care but he just couldn't be good enough for us. And instead of killing himself he ran. But if he couldn't be good enough for Sam with me than I doubt he can do it alone. But she is no better an option. I take care of Paul more than she does.

"I'll think about it Tina. I just don't know. When I first found out I assumed Charlie and Renee would take him. When Charlie died I was so busy taking care of Renee I never really thought about it."

Tina and I go back to my house to let my neighbor go and when all the kids are picked up we feed the boys and Bella dinner and put them to bed and Tina stays the night.

"I can change Alison. I can take good care of all of them. I promise you. I will stop going out. I will be a good mom," she tells me and she sounds so sure of herself.

I believe she believes it, but I just don't know and I'm not sure I want to let her try at the expense of Sam and Bella.


	3. Chapter 3

Alison's POV

Taking care of Bella full time as well as Sam and all the daycare kids is really dragging me down lately. I'm getting sicker too and the doctor says it's partly because of the disease, and partly because I'm not getting enough sleep. I lay awake all night worrying. About Sam, Bella and even Paul. They all depend on me so much.

I get up early in the morning to get things ready for the kids to start coming and right before the first kid arrives Sam comes down the stairs holding Bella's hand. He's only 5, but he's been around kids his age and younger since he was 2 and Josh left. He's good with them, and he especially likes Bella. He would be such a good big brother to her.

The doorbell rings and I open it expecting Leah, one of my 5 year olds.

"Hi Alison." OK it too early in the morning for this.

"What are you doing here Josh?" I ask him while watching Sam take Bella into the kitchen to get her breakfast. I doubt he remembers him, but I don't want to take that chance.

"Tina called me. She told me everything. I'm here… for you, for Sam. To stay. If you'll let me. But if you want me to I will leave and Tina can take Sam and I will send her money." He looks so guilty. He should feel guilty.

"Tina can barely handle Paul; I seriously doubt her ability to take care of Sam and Bella as well." I tell him and he looks confused.

"Who is Bella?" He asks.

"Renee's daughter, I thought you said Tina told you everything?"

"Tina told me that I needed to come make things right and step up and be a father to my son. Why can't Renee and Charlie take care of… Bella?"

"Because they're dead Josh. You missed a lot." I snap at him. Charlie would do anything to be here to take care of Bella.

"Can I please come in Alison, he won't know who I am and I won't say anything to let him know who I am. Then you can catch me up and tell me what you want me to do."

I agree to let him in and grab a protein shake as we sit down, and I tell him all about Tina's husband and Charlie, Renee and Bella.

Sam says hi and Bella babbles at him some, then they go out to watch cartoons. Soon my kids start showing up and I get some looks, but no one says anything luckily. After my kids are settled in and watching a movie we get back to talking.

"You left us Josh. How am I supposed to trust that you're going to stay this time? Sam forgot you easily at 2, he won't forget so easily this time. And once I'm gone you will be all he has. If you walk out on him it will screw him up for life. So let's start with why. Why did you leave us?"

"I don't have a good answer for that Alison, I really don't. I just… you were so perfect. I always felt like you would be better without me. I had no idea what to do with Sam and I hated that. Trying to be a parent made me feel like a complete idiot, and then you were so great at it. You didn't need me."

"But I did need you. I know that you didn't always have the answers when it came to Sam but we loved you. Having you here even when you did things the long way or even flat out wrong was better than being alone. Do you how nice it would have been to have you there to hold me when my best friend died? And when I took custody of her infant daughter? You were supposed to be my support system. You were supposed to be there for all the good and the bad. Even in 3 years you've missed so much of Sam's life."

"I regret every second that I have missed, but I felt like I didn't have the right to come back. You did good for yourself, more proof that you didn't need me. But I want to try to make it right." He looks so sincere.

"I want you to be able to make it right too Josh, I just don't know if that's possible. But you can try. You can come around, but no telling Sam who you are until I trust you more. Or trust you at all. Where are you staying?" I ask him and he tells me he's staying at a hotel about 30 minutes away.

Bella walks into the kitchen where we're sitting and holds her arms up to Josh, squealing. He looks at me.

"You better pick her up. If you don't she'll start screaming, then Sam will come in and his first impression of you will be the man that wouldn't pick up his Bella." So he picks her up, making her smile and he smiles back at her.

"His Bella?" He asks.

"They're close." I shrug.

"So what happens to her?" He asks tickling her and laughing at her giggles.

"I really don't know. I guess Tina takes her." It's not an ideal situation, but I don't really have a better option.

"I could keep her."

"Let's start with you being here for your own son." I tell him.

He nods his head and keeps playing with Bella. Sam comes in and asks him who he is. Josh tells him he's an old friend and his name is Levi, his middle name.

"Can I have my Bella back?" Sam asks him, so Josh puts Bella down and she toddles after Sam. She's just started to walk without constantly falling but she's not very fast.

Josh leaves after giving me his number and getting mine. We make plans for him to come by this weekend and spend time with us.

After he leaves, the day is just any other day but I think about him more than I like. He left me. And more than that he left Sam. He doesn't get to just walk back in and have everything be OK. But at the same time I am dying. And Tina could handle just Bella better than Sam and Bella.

That night at dinner it's me, Sam, Bella and Paul.

"That man was my dad wasn't he?" Sam asks and I choke a little. "I've seen pictures. I'm not a baby mom. Why did he lie to me about his name?"

"I asked him to not tell you who he is Sam. I'm not sure if he's going to stay."

"Is this because you're going to die soon mom?" Sam asks his eyes filling with tears.

"How do you know about that?" I ask him.

"I heard you talking to Paul's mom one night when I came downstairs for a drink. If I live with Josh then where does my Bella go?"

"I'm not really sure yet Sam. Probably with Paul and Tina. So you'll still get to see her." I try to assure him, because I know that's his worry.

"I don't want you to die. And I don't want my Bella to go live with Paul and Tina. Can't Josh keep her too?"

Paul is just listening to us up to this point. 

"I can take care of her Sam, like you do. I know what she eats and what to do when she cries." He tells Sam and I hate that these little kids feel like she is their responsibility. I guess Sam does do a lot for her though, because he can and it's easier for me when I'm dealing with all the other kids, to let him.

"Boys, you don't have to worry about any of this. I will take care of it." I tell them and then they start talking about cars and baseball.

After dinner Tina picks Paul up. Sam, Bella and I curl up on the couch together until Bella falls asleep.

"Do you have to die mom?" Sam asks me and I try to not cry.

"I'm so sorry Sam. How do you feel about Josh being back?"

He thinks about it and tells me it's fine if he wants to stay, but he would rather him keep Bella too. Tina isn't very good with Paul, and Bella is just a little baby he tells me.

"I know Sam but people are going to be more willing to let her stay with Tina because she's a mom and has been involved in her life. People would think it would be weird if Josh took her." I try to explain. I know Josh would never do anything to hurt Bella, but still I think it would look odd to other people.

"I thought we weren't supposed to care what other people thought?" He asks.

"Well we're not but sometimes other people can cause problems. If someone decides that Bella shouldn't be where she is then they could have her put with a family that we don't even know. I know you love her Sam and she'll always be a part of your life."

"When are you going to die mom?" He asks and I tell him I really don't know. It could be anytime from a couple of months to a year. "I love you." He tells me before closing his eyes and falling asleep with Bella. I cover them both and then move to the other couch.

I don't want to leave them. I don't want Bella to have to live with Tina, and I don't want to have to trust Sam with Josh. I just want to stay.


	4. Chapter 4

Alison's POV

For the next few months Josh spends a lot of time with Sam and I, getting to know Sam and doing everything he can to get me to trust him again. He helps out with all the kids on my bad days.

What I did not see coming was one… falling in love with him all over again and two… Bella becoming extremely attached to him. She's so happy to see him and she throws a fit every time he leaves. Sam tries to convince me all the time to let Josh keep her, but I've already set it up for Tina to take her. Tina has been trying harder with Paul, and she's been spending more time with Bella too. Unfortunately Bella does not like her much at all and clings to me when she can or Sam and Paul, if I'm not an option.

Josh and I take the 3 kids to the park one Saturday and we're watching Sam and Paul take turns pushing Bella.

"I could take her you know? She doesn't even like Tina." He tells me causing me to sigh.

"I know, but I just don't know. She's not yours and you didn't even know her 3 months ago. I think Renee would have wanted her with Tina. It would be odd for you to take her. Plus Tina is really trying. She hardly goes out anymore; Paul only spends the night a couple of nights a week now. He hasn't missed school in months. I know Tina will let her visit you and Sam. I just feel like Tina's is the best place for her."

"Yeah OK. Just tell her I will do anything I can to help her." I know he doesn't agree with me, but he doesn't want to fight me either.

"I'm tired Josh. I feel weaker every day." I tell him quietly.

"I'm so sorry Alison. I'm here for you, and I'm here for Sam and Bella."

"I know." I tell him laying my head on his shoulder.

That night at dinner with Tina over I talk to her about Bella.

"Boys can you take Bella upstairs and put on a movie or something?" I ask them and they take her.

"I want to leave Bella with Josh after I'm gone." I tell her after I know the boys are upstairs and can't hear.

"Why? What did I do?"

"It's nothing you did Tina, you've been doing great with Paul and I know you're changing. It's just Bella loves Josh and he adores her. Plus Sam and Bella are so close." I try to explain without upsetting her.

"Paul loves Bella too. And I just don't think Josh is the best option Alison. Sure he's great with her now when all he has to do is play with her, but as she gets older she's going to need a mother. And really Alison, who knows if he's going to stay? He's been great and he probably will stay for Sam, but what happens when he decides he doesn't want someone else's kid? They can both of course be involved, but I really think she would be better off with me and I'm sure Renee would agree."

I know she's right. Renee was never a big fan of Josh's anyways. She thought he was a jerk, which he can be.

"You're right Tina. Just please make sure that she stays close with Sam. He's so attached to her."

"I think it might be best if we go ahead and have Bella move in here with us. That way you can visit her and she might adjust a little better than losing you and moving all together." She suggests and I tell her I will think about it. She's probably right, but I don't like the thought of not spending what time I can with her.

She cleans up the kitchen for me and offers to take the kids back to her house so I can rest. I agree so she gets them ready and after hugs, kisses and I loves yous they leave.

I call Josh to talk to him about my conversation with Tina, and while he tells me over and over he would never leave either one of them, my mind is made.

Then he asks if he can come over and stay the night since the kids are gone.

30 minutes later he's at my door. I let him in and just start crying.

He leads me to the couch and I lay against him crying.

"I don't think I have much longer Josh. The doctor said I would get very tired and then it would get worse fast. I'm exhausted. I think I'm going to let Tina start keeping Bella. Promise me that you will always look after her and Paul too. Paul had a crappy father, just be a good role model for all of them." I cry into him.

"I will be there for all 3 of them I promise you. Are you sure about Bella?" He asks and I nod my head. He sighs, but doesn't push.

"Stay with me tonight?" I ask him and he says of course.

The next day Tina brings the kids back so she can go to work and Bella jumps at Josh. He laughs and picks her up.

"Did you have fun Sam?" I ask him and he smiles saying yes.

"She's not so bad with Bella. She just doesn't always know what she wants, but Paul does. So I think they will be OK." He tells me. I hug him and tell him I'm sure everything will be fine.

Later that day I tell Tina that I am going to keep Bella until I can't anymore and she whines a bit, but gets over it. Josh and I decide he's going to move in with me and take care of Sam and Bella.

I give all the parents of my kids a week notice. They knew this was coming so they have arrangements set up and they offer me and Josh help in any way we need.

"What are you going to do about work? And Sam while you are at work?" I ask him.

"I really don't know, I've been living off of savings and I kind of planned on taking Sam back home. I had a good job there, but now with Bella… I will find something. Don't worry about that." He tells me kissing my head.

Don't worry about it.

Not going to happen, but in these last few months I have grown to love him all over again and I trust him completely.


	5. Chapter 5

Josh's POV

Alison is so sick, she doesn't get out of bed anymore. She refused to spend her last days in the hospital so she stays here with Sam by her side, and often Paul too. Bella doesn't understand and gets upset when Alison doesn't get up to take care of her, so I spend most of the day entertaining her and being with Alison when she is sleeping.

After the kids are all asleep at night she tells me everything I could ever possibly need to know about Sam, Bella and Paul. And all the things to watch Tina for. I hate that she won't let me keep Bella, but I guess I understand. Renee, Alison and Tina were all friends for a long time, and Renee and I never really got along with each other. She never thought I was good enough for Alison. I never really was good enough for Alison, that's why I left her. It was selfish and stupid, and I regret it so much now that I came back just in time to lose her.

"Josh!" Bella screams from her crib, and I run up to get her. She's such a sweet little girl.

I pick her up and take her downstairs to make her and the boy's lunch.

"Go get Sam and Paul sweetheart," I tell her and she crawls up the stairs calling their names. She's not all that stable on the stairs. One day she tumbled half way down so Sam convinced her to crawl.

Paul comes running down and Sam follows holding Bella.

"Mom wants you to ask Tina to keep all of us tonight, but I'm not going. I know she thinks she's going to die soon, and if she's right I want to be here." He tells me putting Bella in her high chair and Paul hands her lunch. Those two take care of her better than anyone could. As sad as it is, I feel better knowing Paul will be there with her once she moves to Tina's. He's a couple of years older than Sam, but they stick together and they both take care of her.

"Yuck!" Bella yells and throws her sandwich on the floor.

"I thought you liked peanut butter and jelly." I tell her. She ate it yesterday, but she shakes her head no.

"She only likes peach jelly." Sam tells me.

Basically she's spoiled.

"We don't have peach. I used the rest of it yesterday."

"I will make her something else." He tells me.

I tell him no I will, and make her a grilled cheese, something I know she will eat.

After lunch I try to get the boys to go to the park, but Sam refuses to leave and Paul won't let Sam stay by himself so I take Bella.

I call Tina asking her to come stay with the boys and if she can take Bella tonight, and Sam too if I convince him.

Once we get to the park Bella drags me around until she's tired and whiney.

Tina says hi with tears in her eyes, and tells me she's going to take Paul and Bella home, but Sam still refuses to go.

Paul and Bella tell Alison good bye, but then Bella flips out when she realizes Tina is taking her.

"Paul will be there Bella, so don't worry. And then I will see you tomorrow. Come on let's go get your shark and some pajamas." He tells and he leads her upstairs.

"I wish she liked me more." Tina whines.

"You don't have to take her Tina, I can keep her."

"You know Renee wouldn't want that. But I think we just need to help each other out. I mean once you find a job we can try to work out a schedule where they can all be with one of us as much as possible. And of course once everything is settled after Alison… you know Bella can spend the night and Sam can spend the night. We'll need each other so let's just not fight about Bella." She tells me.

We weren't fighting, but I figure she's probably just extra emotional with Alison and everything.

Sam comes down with her stuff and they leave.

Then Sam and I clean up the house a little bit, then sit with Alison and watch a movie. He falls asleep curled up with her and I carry him to his bed.

I lay back down with Alison.

"I love you Josh." She whispers and I tell her I love her too as she closes her eyes for the last time.


	6. Chapter 6

Josh's POV (3 years later)

"Don't go daddy." Bella begs me as I pack my bags for a business trip.

"I have to sweetheart, but it's only for 3 days. I'll be back the day before your birthday." I tell her, but she still begins to cry.

After Alison died Tina and I spent a lot of time with each other trying to balance out our lives with the kids. I found a job with a repair company specializing in construction equipment, but I have to travel a lot because there aren't a lot of companies like mine.

Spending so much time together, Tina and I grew close and developed feelings for each other, and 2 years after Alison died we got married, and moved into a bigger house. Tina stays home with the kids. The boys seem perfectly happy with the arrangement, but Bella hates it when I leave, especially when the boys are in school.

"I have to go sweetheart. The boys will be home soon and it's Friday so they will be here with you all weekend."

I don't know why she doesn't like Tina except that Tina doesn't really know what to do with her, and they argue a lot. I guess she didn't take care of Paul much when he was little. Bella is not a bad kid, but she does get bored easily. When Sam and Paul are home they take her bike riding and swimming or whatever, but she doesn't like going places with Tina.

"I'm going to be mad at you if you leave." She whines. I kiss her head and tell her she's always mad at me when I leave.

"Come on Bella, let him get ready. He has to leave soon. Go play outside or something." Tina comes into the room.

"It's pouring down rain Tina, she's fine." I tell her and she sighs, sitting on the bed.

"You have to stop babying her Josh." She tells me in that annoying voice of hers.

"I don't baby her. I'm leaving and she wants to be with me. Chill out Tina. Are the plans for her party all set?" I ask her.

"Yes all the plans are set. I don't even see why she needs a party, she doesn't even have friends. It's all going to be Sam and Paul's friends."

"You had a party and nobody even likes you." Bella offers, and I see Tina getting mad.

"That's not nice Bella." I tell her.

"But it's what she said at her party," she whines back.

I ask what she's talking about, and she replies that Tina was drinking some stuff out of a bottle and saying no one likes her until she fell asleep, and Paul poured the bottle of stuff down the drain.

"Tina?" I ask her as she glares at Bella.

"It was one time. I told her it was a party because she kept asking why she couldn't have any of the whiskey. So I told her it was my party, and I didn't want to share so she would leave me alone. Maybe I got a little drunk, but Sam and Paul were here."

"They are not responsible for her Tina, you are." I tell her picking Bella up, carrying her out of the room.

I love Tina, but I wish she was a better mother. At the same time though I feel like I don't really have a lot of right to judge her since I walked out on Sam.

"Sweetheart does mommy drink stuff like that a lot?" I ask. She shrugs her shoulders in response.

"She's not my mommy, my mommy died. She's Paul mom. Sam doesn't call her mommy. I don't want to either, and Sam and Paul said I don't have too." She crosses her arms and looks at me daring me to argue.

"Fine, but try to be nice to her OK? Don't do things just to make her upset."

"I would never do that daddy." She looks at me in mock shock. I wonder how I'm going to survive her teenage years, and think how good it is that she has two protective big brothers to keep the boys away.

"Bella I know you do that. You colored all over the table, you cut up her magazines, hid her iPad and I'm sure there is more."

"I like to color and cut, and I don't know anything about her iPad." She sticks to her story.

"I know you like to cut and color baby. You have the garage for all that."

She loves anything artistic and creative. Tina hated all the messes she made, and convinced the boys to turn the garage into her personal arts and crafts space.

"Can't I just go with you?" She asks. I tell her no, because there is no one to watch her when I have to work.

"I love you sweetheart and I will call you every night to tell you good night. Be good for her please. At least until the boys get home, then you can just play with them OK? I'll bring you back something OK? What do you want?"

"I want… a necklace! A pretty one. And don't bring Tina one." I tell her to be nice but OK.

Soon after I leave, handing her to Tina so she won't chase after me.


	7. Chapter 7

Josh's POV

I hate leaving the kids, but especially Bella just because she hates it so much. Sam and Paul have only gotten closer so they barely even notice when I'm gone, and I know when they are home Bella is fine. She follows them around and demands they play with her, but she doesn't bother them at all.

They have always been very protective of her. They often get into arguments with Tina over her, when they think Tina is being unfair to her which is basically always. Sometimes Tina is being unfair, but sometimes the boys just think Bella can do no wrong.

Bella can definitely do her share of wrong when she wants to. That's usually when it's just her and Tina.

I'm almost done here and then I'm heading back home just like I told Bella. It's late and I'm trying to sleep, but I don't sleep well when I'm not home.

My life has changed so much in the last few years. When I left Alison I threw myself into work to not think about her and Sam. When Tina called I left everything I had in hopes that Alison would let me back into her and Sam's life.

I had no idea I would become so attached to Bella, but from the first time she demanded I pick her up I wanted to protect her and love her and she took to me so quickly. I know part of it was because she was so young, but I think part of it is because she was meant to be my daughter.

She's already lost so much in her short life.

My phone rings and I answer it to Paul.

"Paul, what are you doing awake so late?"

"_It's Bella, she had a nightmare and she won't settle down. Mom wants to give her Benadryl and I told her I wasn't going to let her drug her, and she can sleep in my room with me; she said fine, but if she can still hear her she's giving her the medicine. Now she's just lying on my floor with Sam crying, and I was just hoping you could settle her down." _I hear him tell her it's me on the phone, and he says OK talk to her now.

"Sweetheart? Can you hear me?"

"_I need you to come home daddy." _She cries into the phone.

"I can't leave until tomorrow afternoon. Baby what's wrong?"

"_You all died. Just like my mommy and daddy and Alison. You, Paul and Sam. It was just me and Tina. I don't want to live alone with Tina. Please come home daddy." _

"Baby it was just a dream. No one is going to die. I can't come home yet, the boys will take care of you." I feel terrible, but I cannot leave until this job is done.

"_There was a bad man and he killed everyone, just like in the movie." _

I think I might kill Tina when I get back.

"It was just a movie sweetheart, you're safe. Is there anything I can do to make you feel better?"

"_Sing me Shooting Stars." _After I sing her the song I tell her I love her, and I will see her tomorrow night.

"_Will you wake me if I'm asleep?"_

"I always do sweetheart. Let me to talk to Paul."

"_I'm here Josh." _

"Thank you for calling me. I need to talk to Tina."

"_OK I will go get her, and don't worry about Bella. I only called you so you could calm her down, Sam and I will take care of her tonight. Sam is walking around with her right now showing her all the doors are locked, and he's going to get her a drink and her shark. Then put her in my bed. I won't let my mom give her the medicine Josh." _

"Thanks Paul." I tell him and he hands the phone to Tina.

"_Hey, I am so sorry he bothered you." _

"Paul is not the problem here Tina. Were you really going to give her Benadryl to make her sleep when all she needed was you to hug her, and listen to her for a few minutes?" I ask her.

"_Oh come on, she's overreacting. I doubt she even had a nightmare, she just likes attention. You act like you don't know her at all." _

"She's 5 years old! Of course she likes attention Tina. Just leave her alone and let the boys handle it OK?"

"That was the plan. I'm sorry Josh… she's just difficult and I don't know what to do with her." She sounds like she really feels bad about it.

"I know, but you need to try a little harder OK? I love you Tina and I will see you tomorrow."

"_I love you too Josh." _

Once I get off the phone with her I know I'm not going to sleep for a while.

I lay awake and worry about Bella. I wonder if Tina is ever going to be better with her. She does fine with the boys, but of course they don't need nearly as much as Bella does. Even at 8 Sam can take care of himself and Bella if he needs to, and Paul grew up taking care of himself when he wasn't with Alison.

I love her, but she's so selfish.


	8. Chapter 8

Josh's POV

I get up early the next morning after barely sleeping, hoping I can finish up this job, and get home earlier than I had planned. After last night I just need to see Bella, and make sure she really is OK. Paul called me this morning before him and Sam went to school to tell me that she was fine after they got her settled, and she slept all night and was still asleep.

I want to see her. Then I need to have a serious talk with Tina. About letting her watch movies that give her nightmares, and then trying to drug those nightmares away.

Her birthday is tomorrow, but her party isn't until the weekend. I probably need to recheck that everything is all set up, because Tina has a tendency to forget things or to just not do them.

I finish my job up mid-afternoon and then head home calling Tina to tell her I'm on the way. I ask to talk to the kids, but she says they are outside riding bikes or something. I tell her I should be home right about bedtime for Bella so please keep her up for me.

"_She's going to be tired Josh, she didn't nap__, __and you know how she gets." _

"Then let her watch a movie with the boys if they don't have homework, and if they do have homework let her sit at the table with them and draw. Honestly Tina I'm tired of you constantly arguing with me when it comes to her. Just do what I tell you to do for once." I snap at her and the line gets deadly quiet for a moment.

"_You are not the one who is here with her all day long, who takes care of her__,__ and has to deal with her all the time." _

"Neither are you! Yes while the boys are at school you tolerate her, but we all know as soon as they are home, and when I'm home you don't want anything to do with her, and she doesn't want anything to do with you! Something has to change Tina. She needs a mother who loves her, not one that deals with her because she has too. She doesn't even think of you as her mom. I have to go. I'll see you in a few hours. Keep her up." I hang up before she has time to respond.

Last night made me realize that I have to do something to stop Tina from treating Bella the way she does. I don't think she realizes what she is doing, but Bella needs a mother.

Sure she's only 5 now, but as she gets older she's going to need someone to talk to about those things boys just aren't good at.

Halfway home I remember I'm supposed to bring Bella home a necklace so I stop at a Target.

I get to the jewelry section, and see a necklace/bracelet set with turtles on it. Then decide I should get the boys and Tina something too. I end up buying the boys a couple of video games, all the kids some candy, and Tina some flowers and expensive chocolates that Bella will probably steal when she's not looking.

Maybe not the chocolates then…

Maybe some parenting books? No that would probably make her mad.

I end up getting the chocolates, planning on warning Bella to stay away from them.

I check out and finish driving faster than before to hopefully get home around the same time.

I get home and Tina runs to me, I kiss her handing her the flowers and chocolates, and tell her to hide them.

"I missed you." She tells me and I tell her I missed her too.

"Where are the kids?" I ask her, because the house is way too quiet for Bella to still be awake.

"In the garage. They've been out there all night; I think Bella wanted to make you something. What did you get them?" She asks so I show her everything, and she tells me it's too much like she always does. "Do you want dinner? Paul and Bella made pizza, and there is salad."

Paul loves to cook, and Bella loves to help him. More often than not he makes dinner. When I first moved in I thought it was because Tina didn't want to, but it turns out Paul would rather make it than let her or me. Bella almost always helps. Sam helps sometimes, but usually Tina and Sam clean up afterwards, and when I'm home I will help them. I can cook, but I don't like it.

"I'll eat after they go to bed, I'm going to go out and see them. How was she?"

"Anxious to see you. I really am so sorry about last night Josh. I know you're upset, but I just didn't know what to do." I tell her we will talk about it later.

I open the door to the garage to see Sam and Bella both covered in paint, painting on her easel. Paul is sitting at the table doing what is probably homework or drawing.

"Daddy!" Bella screams as soon she hears the door. She runs and jumps at me, covering me in paint.

"Hey baby what are you making?" I ask her picking her up and hugging her.

"I'm trying to show Sam how to paint people, but his come out like blobs." She tells me giggling.

Sam rolls his eyes. He has pretty much no artistic skill, he's more athletic. But he supports her and Paul, and they support him. Paul hates sports, but he goes to every single one of Sam's games. Bella likes to go so she can scream and cheer even if half the time she has no idea what's going on.

"Hey I got you something." I tell her handing her the necklace and bracelet. She squeals and demands I put it on. "Just for a minute, you have to go to bed soon." She pouts, but says OK.

I give the boys their stuff, and they run in to play for a while.

"You're covered in paint daddy." Bella points out. I tell her not to worry about it. "I made you something, but it's wet so you can't touch it." She drags me over to her table, and shows me the picture she painted of all of us at the beach.

"I even let Tina be in it." She tells me proudly.

"That was very nice of you baby. You know Tina loves you right?" I ask her.

"Does that mean I have to love her too?" She asks.

"You don't have to love anyone you don't want to, but I hope someday you will love her."

"I love you daddy." She tells me, hugging me again.

"I love you too baby." I tell her sighing. "It's time for bed." She whines the whole way up, but she slowly puts pajamas on and tells the boys good night, and walks to her bed.

"What if I have bad dreams again?" She asks me.

I tell her to come find me, and I will take care of her. Then she reminds me her birthday is tomorrow,I tell her I know, and that I will be home all day with her. I tell the boys they need to get off their game and go to bed soon, they have school tomorrow.

"Can't we skip for Bella's birthday?" Sam asks. I tell him no, but we will go to dinner when they get home.

"Oh, she doesn't want to go to dinner, she wants to make tacos, and then she wants to decorate her own cake. I told her I would make the tacos, but I can't make a cake. I can help her decorate one though. Can you buy her one?" Paul asks me, I tell him yeah that's fine, I will take her tomorrow.

"Is there anything else she wants?" I ask them.

"Nope. I got her some art supplies, and Paul bought her some ponies for the house you got her." Sam tells me.

"OK you two go to bed, you want me to drive you to school tomorrow, since I'm not working?"

They say yes. I tell them good night, and walk back down to eat and talk to Tina.


	9. Chapter 9

Josh's POV

I get downstairs to talk to Tina and she starts apologizing as soon as she sees me.

"It's not enough anymore Tina. You're going to end up really screwing her up. Do you even care about her at all?"

She looks at me in shock, and then starts crying.

"Of course I care about her, but she doesn't like me! She only likes you, and she gets all your attention! How do you think the boys feel when you're all Bella this and Bella that?" She sobs, but I can tell it's completely fake.

"I don't think I neglect the boys, but I will talk to them tomorrow. If they feel like I do, then I will work on that." I tell her calmly even though I really want to yell at her.

"No, the boys will tell you everything is fine as long as Bella is taken care of! She is all anyone cares about!" She stops her fake crying and starts yelling.

"You need to stop yelling, the kids don't need to hear this. Are you jealous of Bella?" I ask her.

"That is the dumbest thing you have ever said to me Josh."

"She needs you to love her. She's lost so much even if she doesn't remember her parents or Alison. She doesn't like you because you do as little for her as possible. She's not dumb… she can tell she's an inconvenience for you. I love her; I would do anything for her, just like I would for Paul or Sam. The boys would do anything for her, even when they probably shouldn't. But you just try to push her away or ignore her. I don't understand why. Can you tell me, why?"

"I don't know! She's just never needed me, and I don't know how to relate to her. She was such an easy baby for Alison." Now she's whining.

"But she does need you! She needs you to not let her watch violent movies, and she needs you to not drug her when she has nightmares! You spend more time with her than anyone. She shouldn't have to spend all her time waiting for me and the boys to get home. Color with her or take her to the park. What do you even do all day?" I ask her.

"She spends most of her time in the garage while I do stuff around here. Or sometimes Sue will bring her little boy over and they play. She doesn't ever want to go anywhere with me. She whines about going to the store or anywhere. I want to be better with her Josh, but I just don't know how." She cries and it's a little more real.

"I don't know Tina, you've already pushed her away to the point where it will be hard, but I think you can change her mind about you. Since this weekend is her party, how about next weekend we all go somewhere different, like the zoo, and you spend most of your time with her. I'll be there, but I will focus more on Sam and Paul. I'll tell them the plan so they'll leave you to her." Hopefully I think to myself.

"You can't tell them that, they'll think I'm a terrible person." She cries.

"Honey they've already formed their opinions. You should have known that when Paul refused to let you give her Benadryl." I tell her honestly.

"I've really screwed up haven't I?" She asks.

"Yeah you have, but she's 5, and she's a good kid. You can fix it. You're sure everything is set for her party?"

"Yes everything is set. I think tomorrow I will just let you spend the day with her, she's really missed you, and I think she probably needs the undivided attention. I ordered her an undecorated cake at the bakery we got Sam's cake at. I figured you could take her to get decorating stuff, and I got all the stuff for her and Paul to make dinner. I was going to wrap the house, but I didn't know where it is. I do love her Josh, I'm going to try."

"Thanks for all that." I tell her in shock, but then I wonder if one of the boys had her do it, and I feel guilty for thinking she couldn't do it on her own.

We go to bed soon after, and I wake up to Bella screaming. I run to her room, and she jumps into my arms.

"They're going to kill you daddy." She sobs into me.

"Baby girl it was just a bad dream." I need to find out exactly what movie she watched.

"I'm scared daddy."

"I know baby, come on you can sleep with me tonight."

I carry her into the room, and put her in the middle and cover her up, laying down next to her. I rub her back, and tell her it's OK over and over until the sobbing stops and she finally falls asleep.

A couple of hours later a knock at the bedroom door wakes me up and I carefully get up.

"Is Bella with you?" Paul asks. I tell him yes and he breathes out in relief. "I usually check on her if I wake up. I was just worried when she was gone. Is she OK, she doesn't usually wake up?"

"She had another nightmare, but she's fine now, she's crashed. Are you OK? I didn't know you checked on her at night."

"Yeah I'm OK. I'm sorry I woke you up. If you want her to sleep in tomorrow you don't have to take us to school." He tells me.

"Bella never sleeps in. Are you sure you're OK? I know her being gone scared you, are you going to be able to go back to sleep?" I ask him.

He says he's fine, and goes back to his room.

When the morning comes Bella actually does sleep later than normal, but I leave her be so I can talk to the boys over breakfast since Tina is still asleep too.

"Do I neglect you two?" I ask them. They both look at me funny, before Sam says no, and Paul shakes his head.

"Why would you think that?" Paul asks.

"Well your mom seems to think I give all my attention to Bella, and I ignore you two, along with her."

"Well you do give Bella more attention, but it's OK. She's little, and she needs more attention, but that doesn't mean that we don't get enough attention. Tina is just jealous of Bella." Sam tells me, and I'm starting to think that really is the issue here.

After breakfast they get their stuff together so I can take them to school and Bella comes bouncing down the stairs saying she wants to come too. So I get her dressed really fast and give her a pop tart to eat in the car.

Both the boys hug her and tell her happy birthday and that they will see her this afternoon.

After we drop them off we go to the store to get whatever she wants to decorate her cake with. Then pick the cake up and go home to drop everything off.

Tina is up making herself breakfast when we walk in.

She smiles and kisses me and tells Bella happy birthday.

"Do you want some breakfast?" She asks and I tell her no, we ate already.

"All you gave me was a pop tart daddy." Bella tells me annoyed. I laugh and tell Tina that she apparently does want breakfast. She makes her eggs, bacon and toast. We all sit down while they eat and plan out the day.

"What do you want to do today baby?" I ask her, and she thinks about it, saying she wants to go to the pottery place and paint something, then have lunch at the Mexican restaurant she likes.

"Sounds good, we can go as soon as you finish eating." I tell her.

"You're coming right Tina?" Bella asks her. Tina tells her no, she was planning on just letting her spend the day with me until the boys got home. "You should come, you can paint with me!"

I look at Tina like, do not tell her no. It's her birthday, and for Bella to want Tina to join us is huge.

"Yeah, OK just let me clean up and go get dressed." I tell her I will clean up so she can go get ready.

"That was nice baby." I tell Bella, though I admit I'm a bit suspicious to her motives.

"You want me to love her daddy, so I'm going to try." She tells me like it's the simplest thing in the world.

Tina comes down, and we head to the pottery place where Bella picks out a horse to paint, she picks Tina out a butterfly, and they sit down to paint. They laugh and talk, and Bella ends up helping her paint.

It's nice seeing them do this together.

After they are done painting we go to the park so Bella can play a little bit before lunch.

"Thanks for coming Tina." I tell her and she looks at me funny.

"She's still my daughter, I do love her. I wasn't going to come, because I figured she would rather me not. I'm going to be different Josh."

Bella screams at me to come push her.

After the park and lunch we take her home, and we watch a movie until it's time to pick up the boys.

"Bella how was your day?" Sam asks her as soon as he gets in, and she tells them everything she did today in detail.

We get home, and the boys sit down to do their homework. Bella sits with them, drawing until they are done. Then her and Paul decorate the cake, and make dinner.

After dinner she opens her presents and spends the next couple of hours playing with her house and ponies. The boys play with her like the good big brothers they are.

"Bedtime baby." I tell her and she throws a fit.

Paul whispers something to her, and she says fine, running upstairs to get ready.

I decide I don't want to know and go up to put her to bed.


	10. Chapter 10

Josh's POV (Bella-9, Sam-13, Paul-16)

"Bella come down here right now!" Paul yells up the stairs to her and she screams down no!

"What is going on Paul?" I ask him concerned because he never yells at Bella. Neither of the boys do, they fight with each other sometimes, but they never get mad at her.

"I want to go to Jared's house. I told her she could come with me, but when I told her Jacob was going to be there, she got all weird and changed her mind. Now she won't even come down and talk to me."

This is crazy, she's 9 years old. She shouldn't be having boy problems already.

"Just go Paul, I'll talk to her and if she wants to come I'll drop her off." Tina tells him and he rolls his eyes at her.

"Yeah mom, she wants to talk to you." He tells her sarcastically.

So their relationship still isn't great. It's partly both Tina and Bella's fault, but a lot of it has to do with the fact that they have absolutely nothing in common.

Tina is high maintenance, into clothes, jewelry and all that other girly stuff. Paul calls her shallow; their relationship isn't all that great either. Bella is into sports, art, half the time she's wearing jeans, and one of the boy's shirts, even though they are way too big for her. I'm pretty sure she does it mostly because it drives Tina nuts.

It doesn't help that to the boys Bella is still never wrong, though Sam tends to stay out of it unless Bella is actually upset about it. Usually when Tina and Bella argue Tina ends up upset, and Bella goes about her life. Paul on the other hand almost always jumps in to take Bella's side.

Tina took trying with Bella to mean forcing Bella into being a girly girl and Bella went with it for maybe a day. Then she decided she wanted to play sports at one of Sam's baseball games so Sam sat with her and explained all the options, shortly after she started playing soccer. She's good too. Tina won't even go to her games because she's mad that she's not doing ballet or beauty pageants.

She signed Bella up for a beauty pageant when she was 5 and Bella was still in her I'm going to love Tina phase. As soon as she found out she had to wear a frilly dress she told Tina it wasn't happening. Tina of course threw a fit but Bella didn't do the pageant.

Sam told Tina he doesn't want her to come to his games if she's not going to come to Bella's and now if I'm out of town the boys get her to hers and they go to all of Sam's as long as the schedule's don't conflict.

Tina and Paul are yelling and arguing about Bella when Sam walks in the room and tells them to stop.

"Lee is coming to talk to her, you two need to cut it out." He tells them.

"I just don't get what her problem is." Paul tells Sam and Sam rolls his eyes.

"She likes him you idiot. He's mean to her because he likes her too. You spend a lot of time with her, how did you miss that?" Sam asks him like he's stupid.

"She's 9! She's too little to being worrying about boys." Paul tells him in horror. It's really hard not to laugh and once again I think how nice it is that she has them to keep boys away.

Leah gets there soon. Leah and Sam have known each other forever but lately they spend a lot of time together.

"Where is she?" Leah asks. Sam tells her upstairs in her room and she runs up.

10 minutes later Bella comes down with red eyes but dressed. She says she's ready to go with Paul.

So she leaves with Paul. Sam and Leah take off leaving me and Tina which is rare but she looks nervous about something.

"What is it Tina? You've been acting weird for a couple of days now." I tell her. She's been distant for the last couple of months but I've been working a lot so I figured that's why. She likes attention and she kind of acts like a child when she doesn't get enough.

"It's nothing really, it's just we've never talked about it and the kids are so much older now and I…"

"Come on, just tell me Tina. I'm sure it will be fine." I tell her.

"I'm pregnant Josh." She whispers.

"You're cheating on me?" I ask her and she starts crying.

"How could you even think that?" She cries.

"I don't think, I'm sure. After I left Alison and Sam I had a vasectomy, because I didn't want to have another child I wasn't good enough for. So who is it Tina?" I ask her as she continued to cry.

"It's um… you don't know him." She lies.

"Who is it Tina? I deserve to know whose child you thought you would pass off as mine."

She mumbles something that I don't understand, and then Paul and Bella walk back inside, Bella rambling about forgetting something. Paul stands there looking between us.

"You were dumb enough to get pregnant? You both told me you weren't going to see each other anymore." Paul tells her and she tells him to stop talking.

"Paul what are you talking about?" I ask him and he looks at Tina. I can tell he's debating.

"Emmett Cullen, she's been cheating on you with Emmett Cullen." Paul tells me. I look at Tina in disgust.

"He's 17 Tina." The Cullens moved in about a year ago and the kids all became friends pretty quick. Emmett is just a year older than Paul, then they have a son named Edward, who is just a few months older than Bella, and a little girl who is a year younger than Bella. Paul and Emmett used to hang out a lot but then they suddenly stopped. I guess now I know why.

"You need to leave. I will get you a hotel room or something until you can find a job and a place to live. I will be filing for divorce." I tell her.

"I'm not leaving without my daughter."

"That's why I didn't tell you Josh. I'm sorry." Paul tells me.

"None of this is your fault. Take Bella back to Jared's. Don't say anything to her or Sam please. I will get this straightened out." I tell him and he yells upstairs for Bella to hurry up.

"If you end up in court you know I'm on your side right?" Paul asks me, I tell him yes I know.

As soon as Bella runs down the stairs Paul ushers her out the door. Once the door closes Tina starts screaming about how Bella is her daughter and I have no rights to her.


	11. Chapter 11

Josh's POV

After she's done screaming she tries crying and when that doesn't work she leaves.

I spend the next few hours calling around to find a good lawyer and researching child custody cases. I'm hoping that since Tina is just her legal guardian and I've been involved as long as she has, more involved really, that I will have a chance. I feel bad for Paul but I don't think I have a case there. Of course Tina may just let him go since I know that she is just using Bella. She doesn't want to have to take care of Bella all by herself; she doesn't even want to do her part to take care of Bella now.

I cannot believe she has been sleeping with our teenaged neighbor. Too bad he isn't younger, I could have had her arrested.

Sam comes homes and asks what we're doing for dinner. I tell him I haven't thought about it and to just go ahead and order Chinese.

"Tina hates Chinese," He tells me.

Sam is the only one she has a decent relationship with. I think it's because he's calmer and doesn't take everything she says or does as a personal attack against him or Bella.

"Well Tina isn't here," I tell him. He gives me a funny look and asks for my credit card.

Soon after Paul and Bella come home I ask Sam to take Bella outside to play and to wait for the food.

"I can fight for you too. I know you're 16 and in two years in won't matter but I can fight for you. And I can do it as you and Bella together or as separate cases," I tell him.

"I don't care about having to deal with her for two years; I just don't want Bella to have to stay with. If you want to fight for me then fine do it but if you want to just focus on her that's fine too. I know you love me but she's the one who needs you."

"I want you to live with me," I tell him, he thanks me and then goes outside with Sam and Bella.

They come in with the food and we all eat. I think about calling to check on Tina but then I decide I'm not going to play her games.

"Dad what is going on? Tina is always here for dinner," Sam questions.

"Um, Tina and I are not going to be together anymore," I tell him, and he looks confused for a minute, then he asks what is going to happen to Bella?

"What about me?" Bella asks.

"Bella, Tina is your legal guardian so if her and Josh don't live together you would have to live with her but don't worry about it. Josh is going to take her to court so hopefully you can live with him and if you do have to live with Tina without him for a while I will be with you," Paul tells her.

"But I don't want to live with just you and Tina," Bella tells him. He tells her he knows and hopefully it doesn't come to that.

After dinner I make sure Bella and Sam have everything ready for school tomorrow then they watch TV until it's time for Bella to go to bed.

Once she's upstairs both the boys have tons of questions for me that I really don't have answers too.

They go to bed a couple of hours later and Tina comes home shortly after, drunk. At least she was smart enough to get a cab home. I should document this or something I think. Proof she's a terrible mother.

"I love you Josh and I'm so sorry but sometimes you work all the time and it's just me here by myself. Even when the kids are home only Sam talks to me. Paul always takes Bella to her practice, then they come home and make dinner, then go to his room to do homework. I hardly ever see them. I know that doesn't make what I did right, but I love you so much, please, please, forgive me," she begs.

"I probably could have forgiven you if it had been another man. But a teenager? He's only a year older than Paul. That I can never forgive Tina. He's a kid."

"But I love you," she tries.

"I love you too Tina but it's not enough. Please let me keep Bella and Paul with me here. You can of course visit them as much as you want but they should be with me. At least Bella and we both know Paul wants to be where Bella is. He's so protective of her. I know you love them, but you and Bella just… clash, and Paul just wants to be where she is, because he's spent pretty much her whole life worrying about her, protecting and defending her from you."

"She's mine and he is too."

"And how do you plan on supporting them?" I ask her hoping to make her see reason.

"I will um, I used to work!"

"At the bar? You also used to be younger and… yeah younger. You let me keep them, and I will keep paying the rent on an apartment for you and I will help you out with bills until you can find something," I offer and she thinks about it.

"Or I could just take you to court for child support." She's an idiot.

"For the kids that aren't mine? Tina you're being dumb, you cannot support 3 kids on your own. Let me take them, and I will pay the rent so you can get a job and support this baby. Unless of course you think the 17 year old next door is going to take care of you."

"You're not getting her," she demands.

"I will take you to court, and I will win. You will be broke and probably homeless, trying to raise a newborn. Is that really what you want to do?"

"I get half of everything!"

"No you don't, because you cheated on me. There is no way for you to win this," I tell her hoping she believes me, because there is a chance that I won't win custody of Bella, and an even less a chance for Paul.

"You would really just throw me out like that? Throw Bella and Paul out?" She asks, and I know she has me there. There is no way I'm going to let Bella and Paul be broke and homeless.

"No I will support you until I get them back, and if I don't get them back then I will figure something else out then. But I will not support you, I will figure out how to support them without helping you. Don't do this Tina. Don't put them through that."

"You're not taking my kids," she tells me then walks out of the room.

Maybe I can't but I'm sure going to try.


	12. Chapter 12

Josh's POV

The next day I call into work, and spend the morning calling everyone I can think of that can testify on my behalf. Even Sue, who is really Tina's only friend, agrees the kids are better off with me. Tina took off early this morning.

I have the support of Bella's teachers, since I'm the one that does parent/teacher conferences, and picks her up when she's sick. I have the support of her soccer coach, since Tina has never been to a game.

I walk next door to talk to Esme, Emmett, Edward and Alice's mom.

"Josh, how are you?" She opens the door smiling.

"Not great. I have to talk to you about something. I hate to be the one to tell you this, but Tina has been sleeping with Emmett, and now she's pregnant with his kid. I'm going to take her to court for Paul and Bella." I feel really awful having to tell her this.

"Oh my goodness, this explains a lot. He's been so secretive and distant lately. He's been skipping school too. Is there anything I can do?" She asks.

"I might you need to testify against Tina, just saying she's not involved in Paul and Bella's life."

"Of course anything, honestly I've never cared for her. What is she going to do about the baby? As much as I can't stand her, that is my grandchild," She asks, looking so sad.

"I really don't Esme, I'm sorry. As you can imagine Paul and Bella are my priority. I can't worry about the baby though I did offer to pay her rent and bills; until she could find a job and a place of her own if she let me keep them, but she wants to fight," I tell her.

"I'm going to fight for the baby," she seems to decide right then.

I don't blame her.

I go back home to gather all my stuff, pick up Paul, and go to the meeting. The lawyer suggested he be as involved as possible, so it will be more like he is trying to stay with me by himself rather than me trying to take him from Tina.

I check him out of school, and we drive an hour away to the lawyer's office.

"Are you sure you want to do this Josh? Aren't your chances better to just fight for Bella?" He asks after we start driving.

"Maybe, but it doesn't matter. I want both of you with me," I tell him honestly.

"Oh, well you're going to do separate cases right?" He asks me.

"I thought about that, but my chances are actually higher if I do it together. It shows that you are both equally important to me which makes me look better. You are both equally important to me, you understand that right?" I ask him. I don't want him to think this is all about Bella.

"Yeah I know, but it sounds like you should just try to get Bella. I don't want to hurt your case with her. Two years I can handle, plus once she loses Bella she probably won't even care. You're all she's ever cared about. You're the only reason she even wanted Bella. If you hadn't come back, who knows where Bella would be, and Tina and I would probably be with some man who beat the crap out of both of us. But I'm old enough to take care of myself now, and I know you would still let me see her. Right?"

"Of course, and no matter what happens I will be there for you. Once you're old enough you can live with me, and I will help you with college. I know you love Bella. I never really understood why you're so protective of her, but it never mattered. You're a great brother."

"I'm not going anywhere if Tina wins. I'm not going to college, leaving Bella alone with her. I love Bella, I have since she was just a baby, but I guess after my dad killed her dad it made me want to protect her. Did you consider Tina trying to get custody of Sam just because?" He asks.

"Yes I actually did consider that, and while there is no chance of her getting full custody she could get visitation. I talked to him this morning, and he's OK with her getting visitation. He actually likes her," I tell him.

"I love her. I just don't like the way she acts like we're always in the way of her life. I hope she doesn't end up hating me, because I would like to be a part of the baby's life."

"Esme is going to fight for custody of the baby," I tell him. He doesn't blame her either.

"I thought Emmett was my friend. Then one day after I took Bella to practice, I ran home because I forgot the book I had to finish for the next day's class. I ran in and they were on the couch. They didn't even try to hide it, but then they both swore it was over. That was about 6 months ago, so they obviously lied."

"It's been going on for that long?" I ask him in shock.

"Yeah I'm so sorry Josh, but I knew she wouldn't let you have Bella," he tells me looking guilty, even though I've told him over and over this is all Tina's fault.

"I don't know why you're being so nice to her still, offering to help with the baby money wise and all. She cheated on you with a teenager, and she's trying to keep Bella from you just to punish you. You're so blind to her. I don't even know why you were with her, but I liked you being there, and I liked Sam and Bella being there. Alison was my family. I was so afraid I would be alone with Tina after she died." I can't remember when he stopped calling her mom.

"I really do love her Paul, but I have thought lately that maybe it was just the easy thing to do."

We get to the lawyers office, and I can tell Paul is nervous. I ask him why, and he says he's just afraid he's going to mess everything up for me.

"You're not going to mess anything up, just be honest. We are not the problem here," I tell him, relaxing him a little before we walk in.

Once we get in and sit down with the lawyer, he explains all the options and I officially file for divorce.

Since Paul and Bella are legally hers and not mine I can't keep them until we get a hearing but I can keep her from taking them out of the state. I also can't kick her out of the house since it's our house. I don't even care about the house but I'm not leaving Bella and Paul unless I have too.

"Your best option is to do both kids as one case. Paul will be able to tell a judge he wants to stay with you and we will show that when you have to travel he's the one that takes care of Bella. You get all the people you have to testify that Tina is uninvolved. It shouldn't be hard to win, even though you're not legally responsible for either of them, which of course would make you responsible for both of them. She will probably get visitation, but we can push for supervised only. She might also try to get visitation with your son. The only problem is, it does look bad on you that you let Paul take so much responsibility for her, but we can spin it as you trying to keep your family together," he explains to us.

I was trying to keep my family together.

_A/N Thanks for all the reviews! I know I don't usually respond but I l appreciate every single one of them._


	13. Chapter 13

Josh's POV

Living with Tina is tense on the best days, and all our war on most of the others. Everything Bella or I do makes her mad, and she tries to do everything she can to get Paul on her side. She's only 16 years late on that one.

Paul and Sam keep Bella out of the house as much as possible. The court date is set for one month from now, and I think Tina realizes her chances are slim, since she has no one on her side. Though, she keeps telling me I'm not taking her kids.

I took a job that has me running the office instead of traveling. I make less money, but it's a huge plus for me in the custody case.

I'm making dinner and waiting for the boys and Bella to get home from her practice.

"I can't eat fish Josh. It makes me sick," Tina says, glaring at me.

"Then don't eat it."

"You're making all of this so difficult!" She yells as she storms out.

Soon the kids come home. With all the chaos of dinner and homework it's easy to forget about Tina.

"Dad I know you're fighting with her, but someone has to worry about the baby," Sam tells me.

Paul tries to tell him that she can take care of herself, and Sam yells back that she doesn't and they begin fighting, until Bella starts crying.

"Hey Bella we're sorry," Sam says as he hugs her.

"All anyone ever does is fight anymore. In a month I could lose you Sam. You and dad. I just want things to be normal!" She tells him through her crying.

"You're not going to lose them Bella," Paul tries to explain, but she runs upstairs.

"How do you give a damn about Tina?" Paul asks Sam.

"My mom loved her. She's not as bad as you make her out to be, plus you're kind of unfair to her. You act like Bella is this perfect little child and she's not. She does a lot of stuff just to make Tina mad. I'm not saying Tina is a great mom, but you never really gave her a chance either."

"Are you on side her in this? If you screw this up for Bella, I will kill you.," Paul threatens. I'm not sure he's not completely serious.

"You two need to stop. Sam is not going to do anything to hurt the case, and you could try not snapping at Tina every time she talks. There is a small chance she could win, and she will mostly likely end up with visitation. Do you really want Bella to hate her so much that all they do is fight the whole time?"

"What I want is for Bella to never have to see her again."

"Yes I understand that, but it might not work out like that. You need to prepare yourself for that, and you probably should prepare Bella for that," I tell him. I've noticed he's acting a little off.

"I thought she wasn't my responsibility?" He snaps, and Sam looks at him like what the hell?

"She isn't. It's just that lately you seem to be the only person she'll talk to about this, but you're right. I'll talk to her. Is everything OK with you?"

"I got into this summer art program that is extremely hard to get into, and I can't go," he answers.

When I ask him why, he looks at me like I'm stupid, telling me someone has to take care of Bella if she ends up with Tina.

"Paul you should take it, " I encourage him, but he rolls his eyes and goes upstairs.

"I'm sorry dad. I didn't mean to make them mad," Sam tells me and I feel awful for him.

"None of that actually had anything to do with you Sam. Bella is just worried she's going to have to stay with Tina, and Paul is worried about Bella. Now he's thinking he has to give up this art program, and he's just stressed out. I'm going to go talk to her now."

I knock on Bella's door and she yells at me to go away, but I walk in anyways.

"Hey kiddo, Sam is downstairs thinking you hate him," I tell her, making her look up at me from her bed.

"I don't hate Sam. Why does he think that?"

"'Cause lately you and Paul stick to yourselves, ignoring him. I know you're worried, but Sam is too. He's just quieter about it. Do you think Sam really wants to never see you again?" I ask her.

"Does Tina hate me that much? That if she wins she would completely keep you and Sam away from me? What did I do to her?" She asks so sadly I consider killing Tina for a minute.

"You didn't do anything Bella," Tina answers her from the doorstep, "I do love you, we've just never got along, but I know if I lose you, I lose the only reason Paul speaks to me."

"But that's not fair! If you love me then you should want me to be happy, and living with dad will make me happy. Dad, Sam and Paul. Please Tina?" She starts crying, though I'm pretty sure it's fake.

Tina comes to sit on the bed with us, just staring at Bella for a minute.

"Somewhere along the way you became the most important person to… well everyone in this house. If I let you live with Josh full time without a fight, you have to promise me you will try to make Paul and Sam keep in touch, and that you will too. I do love you Bella," She tells her quietly.

"You would really do that?" Bella asks her so hopefully. I'm really hoping she's not just being mean.

"I really would," Tina tells her.

"I promise you I will make Paul bring me to come see will come anyways. I really think Paul will come willingly, because he wants to be a part of the baby's life. So you'll let me and Paul stay with dad now?"

"I will. We can go tomorrow and talk to our lawyers."

Bella hugs her then jumps up saying she's going to go tell Paul and Sam.

"You're serious Tina? Because if you're doing this to get her hopes up…"

"I'm serious Josh. Hearing her ask you why I hate her, made me realize what a terrible person I'm being. I don't want to lose them, and I hate that I'm losing you, but I'm going to start over with this baby. I'm going to be a better mother and a better person. I'll agree to you having full custody. I won't even ask for visitation, and I'll drop the case for Sam, but please try to get them to at least come visit me."

"I will, thank you so much Tina, and I meant what I said before. I will help you out until you can find a job and a place to live."

"I want this house," she demands.

"Tina that's not really fair."

"You want to take everything from me don't you?" She whines.

"Not that you don't deserve it, but no I don't. I just don't want to take the kids out of their home. This is the only house Bella remembers. I want to keep things as normal as possible for all of them. Plus, I can't afford this house, along something big enough for all of us. I can rent you a nice two bedroom apartment for you. You and the baby will have plenty of room."

"I don't want to lose you Josh," she whispers.

"You already have Tina, but you have the chance to not lose the kids as well. You know if Bella asks Paul to visit you he will, and you know if you willingly give me custody, letting us stay here, they will both be more likely to stay in your life."

She walks out saying she'll think about.


	14. Chapter 14

Paul's POV

Josh and Tina told me and Sam this morning that they are going to meet with their lawyers. Tina says she's going to sign over custody of Bella and me to Josh, and drop the case for Sam, but she would like us to be in her life still.

I was about to tell her she could go to hell but Bella looked at me with a play nice look on her face so I didn't. I doubt she's telling the truth anyways.

I'm in the carpool line at Bella's school waiting to pick her up so I can take her to practice. The line monitor comes to my window and tells me Bella isn't here, she got picked up early by our mom. I drive away and call Josh asking him why Tina would pick Bella up.

He tells me he doesn't know but not to worry about it. She signed the papers like she said she was going to and she even agreed to let him keep the house in exchange for him renting her an apartment for her and the baby.

I guess Esme decided to not fight for custody of the baby because her husband didn't want her too. Emmett moved to live with his aunt and uncle across the country but he swears he's going to come back for her as soon as he turns 18. Gross.

After I get off the phone with Josh I call Tina but it goes straight to voicemail so I call Sam who hasn't heard anything either. Something is wrong; Bella should've called me as soon as Tina picked her up. I know Tina is trying to play the good, selfless mom and she's pretty good at acting but I know Bella doesn't trust her completely so even if she willingly went with Tina she would have called me unless Tina wouldn't let her.

I drive to Josh's shop, walking in to find him.

"Hey Paul," Rachel, the receptionist smiles at me. She's Jacob's older sister so I see her here and when I drop Bella off at their house.

"Hi Rach, is Josh here?" I ask. She responds no he just left to get some parts from another shop.

"Is everything OK?"

"No, Tina picked Bella up from school and she didn't call. That's not normal for Bella and Josh isn't worried because Tina is doing this whole I've changed thing but even if she really did pick Bella up for bonding or something stupid like that Bella would have called. She didn't call here did she?"

"Well I've only been here for about an hour but no she hasn't called. I'm sure she's fine though, she can take care of herself pretty well you know?"

"She shouldn't have to though. OK, please call me if you hear anything, and tell Josh to call me when he gets back," I say getting more worried and she says sure.

I try Tina and Bella again. When that doesn't work I call Josh again. Now he's slightly worried since I still can't get ahold of Bella. He tries to tell me he's sure everything is fine but he'll try Tina too and come home as soon as he drops this part off.

When I get home Sam asks if I've heard from them. I tell him no and he seems worried too.

"Maybe Tina took her shopping or something since she's trying to suck up so Bella will make you come see her," he offers. It makes sense.

"But Bella still would've called," I insist.

"Oh! I have her phone. I was talking to Lee on it this morning because mine was charging. I forgot I ended up taking it and Tina's is probably dead like it usually is. Chill out, Bella's smart. She's not going to let Tina kidnap her or anything."

"Not unless Tina lied to her about one of us or Josh. All she would have to do is get her in in the car but you're probably right. What do you want for dinner?" I need to do something to keep my mind off of what is probably nothing.

"I don't care, I'll be right back," He runs upstairs. When comes back down he looks even more panicked. "Call my dad and ask him if took his emergency cash."

I call Josh but all he says is he'll be home soon.

"She took it all Paul," Josh keeps around $5000 in cash just in case we ever needed anything while he was out of town.

"I don't understand why she would sign over custody then turn around and take her though," I tell him confused.

"It's probably because she knew that no one would worry except you. She probably knew dad and I would be stupid about it thinking that since she signed the papers everything was fine. She took her Paul. Call dad and tell him. I'm going to call the cops."

I call Josh telling him Sam is calling the cops on Tina. He says he's just 10 minutes away at this point.

I never should have listened to them. It seems like if anyone is going to take care of Bella it has to be me.


	15. Chapter 15

Bella's POV

"Tina where are you taking me?" I ask her for the hundredth time.

"Houston." She actually answers this time.

"Why?"

"Because that's where we are meeting Emmett. Me, you, this baby, and Emmett are going to be a family." She tells me like this is a perfectly sane plan.

"I don't want to be a family with you Tina. I want Josh, Paul and Sam. You said…" I try not to cry. Crying won't do any good, with her being a freaking crazy person, and it will make me tired if I cry too much.

I don't really know Emmett, he used to come over and hang out with Paul. Edward would come with him sometimes and hang out with me but he doesn't seem crazy. Maybe, just maybe, my crying will work with him. 

"I'm sorry Bella but I love you and you're my daughter. Plus if I can't have Josh then Josh can't have you." So there is the real truth. "You should sleep or something it's a long drive and I obviously can't put us on a plane. I'm sure they are looking for you by now."

Does she think they are too stupid to talk to Emmett? Or is he part of this plan?

"I'm not tired. Did you even bring any of my stuff?" Stupid Sam taking my cell phone to talk to Lee this morning.

"No, I couldn't. I wanted to but Josh was home when I left. We'll buy you some stuff when we stop for the night."

"I don't want some stuff, I want my stuff. What about all my stuff you can't just buy at a store?"

"OK Bella listen, I know this sucks for you. It sucks for me too but if you could just try and get over it… that would be great. This is your life now."

I hate her more and more by the second.

"Paul is your son."

"Paul would kill me in a heartbeat if he thought it would make you happy." She tells me bitterly, though it's probably true.

I lay my head back, and close my eyes, hoping they are looking for me, and that they find me soon. I'm going to miss so many games.

After what seems like forever Tina stops at a hotel and gets us a room, ordering pizza to eat.

"Can I least call dad or Paul to tell them I'm OK? I'll stand right here so you can hear me, I promise I won't tell them anything." I plead with her but she says no because her phone is dead and I obviously can't use the hotel phone.

I yell that I hate her then lay in one of the beds and put the pillow over my head. I hate her so much. Maybe I can sneak out and find someone to help me.

I wake up the next morning. I cannot believe I fell asleep.

"Oh good you're awake. Do you want a shower before we go?" She asks like this is all totally normal.

"Why would I take a shower when I don't even have clothes to change into?"

She tells me we can run to Target to get some clothes and breakfast then come back and take a shower.

After all that we're back to driving. She keeps asking me questions as if she wants to have a conversation. The whole time I'm thinking maybe I can get her to stop somewhere crowded for lunch so I can slip away and get help.

She's not as dumb as I thought though, instead going through drive thrus and waiting for me to fall asleep at night before sleeping. She knows once I'm asleep nothing wakes me up.

After 4 days of misery we get to Houston and pull up to a little house in a nice neighborhood.

"How did you get a house without a job?" I ask her.

"Oh I've always had money. I just never used it because I knew one day I might need it. Paul's dad is dead, I've gotten checks since he died. Do you like it? You'll have your own room and I'm going to hire someone one to turn one of the extra rooms into an art studio for you. You can join the soccer team here soon. I have a job lined up to start on Monday and I hired a nanny for you."

"And by nanny you mean someone to make sure I don't try to escape? How do you plan on keeping me from talking at school?" I ask her. I don't like how well she has this all planned out.

"The nanny is a certified teacher, she'll be homeschooling you. I told her that you're father and brothers abused you but you are in denial. So for the sake of this you will also have a therapist. I have documentation proving all of this."

We walk into the house and I think how nice it is, how normal it looks, how the neighbors are just going to think Tina is a single mom with a daughter. Not a crazy kidnapper.

"This will never be my home." I tell her trying not to cry.

"Bella I'm sorry it has to be like this but it's going to be OK." She tries to reassure me but I run up the stairs looking for what is supposed to be my room. I open doors until I find the one all in pink and purple. Then I scream I hate you down the stairs. I hate pink and purple. I hate her. I will find my way home.


	16. Chapter 16

Bella's POV

I fall asleep in this stupid girly room and dream about when I was little. When my dad and brothers would take me swimming at the lake. Next thing I know, I wake up crying.

Seeing that it is dark outside, I think maybe I can escape. I just have to convince someone to call my dad. I don't know if Tina signed custody of me over to him. I doubt it since she kidnapped me but I do know that she's not supposed to take me away until the court date.

I quietly sneak down the stairs to see Emmett sitting on the couch drinking a beer. Good job, I think about Tina, let's add giving alcohol to a teenager to the list of things she's not supposed to do.

"Hey Bella." He greets me cheerily like nothing is wrong. I just stare at him.

"Why are you helping her?"

His face falls as he thinks about it.

"I love her, I want her to be happy."

"You're stupid Emmett, she doesn't love you. She wants Josh, she only brought me here to hurt him. She told me in the car if she can't have Josh then he can't have me. You're like… 2nd place if even that. You're probably only here because she thought she could use the help controlling me and someone to take care of the baby once it's born. Help me get home Emmett and I won't tell them you were involved. I will tell them you thought she was coming alone and as soon as you found out about me you helped me get home. My dad and brothers are my family. Tina has never cared about me. Please Emmett?" I cry a little because even if he is stupid and in love with Tina I don't think he is a bad person.

"I can't Bella… if she goes to prison I'm going to lose the baby. I can't afford to take care of it and my parents won't help me."

I run back to my so-called room, slamming the door. A few minutes later Tina comes in and sits on my bed.

"Bella you can't be acting like this. You woke me up. The baby and I need rest."

"I don't care about you or the baby Tina." I tell her but I'm lying. I do care about the baby but only because no matter who its mother is Paul is its brother.

"You'll adjust Bella I promise. Tomorrow we're going to meet the soccer coach, and your new nanny/homeschooler." She tells me in that fake nice voice and I want to hurt her.

"I hate you." Shee rolls her eyes at me then leaves the room.

The next day I meet the soccer coach, Riley, and my new nanny, Kaylee, who I can tell right away is in love with Emmett so I'm not going to get anywhere with her. I just have to hope that my dad is looking for me.

The next week at soccer practice I just can't seem to get in the groove of things. I'm not used to having a practice without someone there to support me. Emmett is here but it's more to make sure I don't escape than anything.

After practice Riley asks if I can stay a few minutes to work on some plays but Emmett tells him he has to go so I can't. Riley offers to drop me off in a couple of hours and Emmett agrees then leaves. Ha, Tina is so going to kill him.

"So… your mom says that you're this amazing soccer player and I can see you have the skills. But it seems like your heart isn't in it. I just wanted to tell you I'm here if you ever want to talk about anything. Your mom kind of filled me in on your past and I understand more than you would think."

"I'm sorry Coach please don't kick me off. Soccer is the only good thing I have in my life. I'll try harder. I'm not trying to sound arrogant but I am amazing. I'm just not used to my brother not being here. I didn't know how much that helped." I explain causing him to get a funny look on his face.

"Your brother came to your practice and it actually helped?" He asks confused. Now I'm confused too.

"Why wouldn't it have helped?" I question.

"Well usually when someone is… well um, never mind." He stammers.

"Oh, you mean someone that abuses me should make me nervous. I forgot for a second that is the story Tina is telling."

"Story?"

"It's not like you would believe the truth." I tell him shrugging my shoulders.

"Try me. You might be surprised. I told you I understand your past. If it helps I will tell you my story first." I nod my head yes so he starts. "I have a half-sister, same dad different mom. We didn't know about her until she was about your age. She came to us broken and scared. She cried if someone so much as looked at her wrong even though we had done nothing to her. Her mom hurt her a lot and she thought everyone was bad. She had a step dad who treated her like his own daughter, loved and adored her, but… he was afraid he would lose her if he told anyone about her mom so he just did what he could to make it not as bad. She slowly came around but she still didn't trust any woman, to this day she doesn't get along with my step mom. I've done studies on this because I want to be able to help kids like her. You're not like her at all and she's the normal in this equation."

"I can't because if you think I'm crazy and talk to Tina or Emmett they will make me quit the team." I tell him sadly.

"I won't tell them I promise. Even if I don't believe you I won't mention it."

"Whatever, it's not like my life can really suck much more." And I tell him everything, starting with the fact that Tina is not my mom. I tell him that my dad or brothers have never hurt me. While Tina never hurt me she never did anything good for me either. I tell him how my dad and brothers made every game they could with Paul at every single one. Sam had his own games sometimes and dad was out of town a lot. Then he split his time between my games and Sam's.

"Tina never came to a single game. And the teenager who brings me to practice, that's her 17 year old lover. He's almost the same age as her son. I'm not supposed to be here. She wasn't supposed to take me out of the state until the custody hearing. She wanted to hurt my dad." I spill everything trying not to cry.

"Can this be proved?" He asks. For the first time since I found out Tina was kidnapping me I feel some hope.

"I'm sure it can be if you call my dad and he gets the lawyer to send the papers." I tell him excitedly.

"Yeah I pretty much believe you, but you are still 9, and I don't really know you so… I have a brother who works for the police department. I will give him all your info, and have him see if there is a case open from where you came from. But for now you have to go back to Tina and pretend this never happened OK? I promise you Bella that if you're not supposed to be with her I will get you back home."

"Thank you so much. When will you go?" I ask him hopefully, he tells me as soon as he takes me home.

He takes me back to Tina's house and she is beyond mad at both me and Emmett. I assure her we just worked on some plays. I pathetically tell her I know that no one is going to believe me over her so why bother? Then I run to my room refusing to eat dinner like I do every night, I always sneak down stairs after she is asleep and eat. Emmett knows but he doesn't care. Even in the short time we've been here he's starting to see how life with Tina really is.


End file.
